I have to write this extremely fast. I’m getting charged per minute because I’m pretty drunk after a hefty Saki Bomb at the Sushi Ink which is about a 100 yards from the hotel. Kelly the waitress/assistant manager dyed her hair pink for some reason. She obviously wants to be in LA not f’n Phoenix, but she’s stuck here defending her willingness to stay in this fake wasteland. She had no time for our shenanigans and served us and moved on relatively quickly. I gotta admit, I was too much of a wimp to finish the entire Kirin and saki shot. But, I suppose I wasn’t unwilling to pay for it.
Alfred Williams, Mike Evans, Vic Lombardi and myself spent most of the night at the Hard Rock, which is like having a blast at McDonald’s. The food was decent. We ran into a few Bronco fans including one dude who had met his wife because of the Broncos. She was from Bulgaria. They told us the whole story, but honestly after all the drinks we had, the details of some sort of bizarre mail order bride thing were not all that interesting. I get it. You aren’t that attractive, neither am I. You ordered a semi good looking girl from an eastern block country and thank god you will never have kids because obviously there is a reason you can afford to get littered on a Wednesday night with us in Phoenix.
I have to admit, Phoenix was kind of fun tonight, but again that may be the daquaris and Stellas talking. I haven’t seen anything interesting about this city. They did shutdown a bunch of streets and there seems to be some good cover bands from the 80’s jamming. It’s not every day you hear a slammin’ cover of Footloose. Party on Phoenix.
I asked Bill Belichick if it bothered him after an amazing career that his team and organization is considered a “bunch of cheaters”. Okay, I’ll admit, I asked the question that way to draw some attention to myself. He said he was onto Seattle. Nice answer. The honest answer would be yes – unless of course he is knee deep in Deflategate which we all know he is. Believe it or not, besides Broncos players and coaches, I have spoken with Belichick and Tom Brady more than anybody else the NFL over the course of the past 20 years. It’s stunning that this is my 4th Super Bowl covering the Patriots in the Big Game. You would think that because of my New England roots that I would be quite the Pats cheerleader – I am not. But then again, my folks still live in Massachusetts so I suppose I will somewhat cheer for the red, white and blue.
I honestly can’t stand the Belichick act. He is smart and funny and it’s all a big phony act. Marshawn Lynch is a big phony act. I basically threatened to fight him today calling him a total phony to his face. He lurched forward as if it was ON Oaktown style. Bring it Cal Bear boy! Listen, I know not all the classes at Cal are for the next Einstein, but I also know you can’t be a complete dope and be at that school. Trust me, I went to Syracuse, I know complete dopes as I went to class with them. Lynch’s act is phony and is derived to draw attention to himself, so I called him on it. He didn’t like it, but whatever. He has fellow Cal alums like low life Michael Silver who go out of their way to defend him. Dude, here’s a piece of advice, stop writing defensive pieces about guys you went to college with! When there needs to be a sympathetic article about Rony Siekly, I guess you should keep my name in mind. Marshawn and I have a long two year history. I ask him direct questions and he pretends he doesn’t like speaking to the media. It works well.
However, the Seahawks are actually a great team to cheer on as their enthusiastic fans do so well. They easily outnumber Pats fans 3 to 1 here in the land of the sun. It’s gonna be a cheering bloodbath at the actual game. I have nothing but respect for Michael Bennet who Richard Sherman told me is absolutely the most ‘out there’ personality on the Seahawks. Now, that’s saying something!
I asked Pete Carroll if he could win with integrity in the NFL. He did NOT say “onto New England” instead, he gave a solid, well thought out response basically saying we are all responsible for our mistakes and we should always try to address them as soon as possible even if the next move is to make other mistakes. It was insightful, respectful and thoughtful. It was well appreciated and makes me realize there is no other boss I would rather have than Pete Carroll. If I had to work with Bill Belichick every day, I would want to drive off the Tobin Bridge, fall into a card game organized by Whitey Bulger and Casey Affleck in Charleston and be shot in the head by Marky Mark while carrying in some groceries to my fabulous condo.
Gronk is cool. Tom Brady is such a good looking dude it’s sick. Julian Edelman now looks like a character out of the Yukon men on Discovery. But, overall the Hawks are simply the better team. If they lose, I will be shocked.
Wade Phillips came in second place to Vance Joseph and won the job at the Defensive Coordinator of the Broncos. I was stunned to see that I was already blocked by him on twitter. Hey, is it my fault he stupidly benched Flutie for Rob Johnson? What are you afraid of “@SonofBum” – the truth? It is a crying shame that Wade got the job over Joseph. It’s not fair and it’s not right, but then again this is the NFL. Belichick is nothing but a world class cheater and you know what, despite my man love for him, Carroll isn’t all that much better, he’s just more honest.
This is the Super Bowl that the world wished it could forget. Wednesday was sort of more calm and more fun for me to ask tough questions to the main players. But, it doesn’t matter. “You know why I’m here”, to cover these dopes, wear shorts all week and try to choke down Saki Bombs while convincing Kelly or Kelsey or Kylie or whatever her name is to pursue her life’s passion, not serve me an undercooked Shrimp Tempura roll at a disposable sushi joint 1000 miles from an actual ocean.