Welcome to Titletown 2045

As Dan Williams and Marcello Romano step out of the DeLorean and onto Josh Kroenke (formerly Speer) Boulevard, with Huey Lewis still rocking on 8-track in the background, they’re immediately surprised and delighted to see a massive “Welcome to Denver: Home of World Champions” sign spanning the eight-lane elevated thoroughfare with express parking exits for the WalBev Center.

Somewhat shockingly, their press passes from the 2015-16 Denver Nuggets run to the Western Conference Semifinals still work (though not as surprising as that run actually was). They’re ushered into a tactilegraphic (holographic is so 2025) history exhibit cataloging all of Denver’s (and Josh Kroenke’s) world titles. Their artificially intelligent tour guide begins to speak as real-life scenes are played out around them (thank you 3D printing technology)…

“After acquiring the Colorado Rockies when the Monfort brothers were forced to give up ownership because a rampant case of mad fan disease swept through Lower Downtown Denver, Mr. Kroenke immediately invigorated a longtime losing franchise. Through Mr. Kroenke’s visionary leadership, and propelled by the right arm of Dante Bichette III, the Rockies won a staggering six-consecutive World Series titles. Mr. Kroenke’s introduction of a barometric-pressure-controlled domed stadium was the ultimate difference-maker for the city once infamous for its thin air and home runs.”

The tour guide pauses for a moment for an obligatory sponsorship promotional message…

“We hope you’ll join us at Super Bowl 80, presented by AgroPharm. Your Denver Broncos are favored by 11.5 points against the Santa Monica Saints. Place your bet on the game using the team’s exclusive wagering service Bet Broncos and you could win an all-expense-paid trip via solar train with a VIP experience with quarterback Marshall Manning. Winners will also receive lodging at Jacksonville’s finest luxury beachfront hotel. Join us as the Broncos go for their tenth world championship and remember Bet Broncos!”

Danny quickly checks his wallet, but Cello reminds him that his credit card (even the new one with the microchip) probably will not be valid, unlike their Nuggets press passes. And with that, basketballs start flying around them and eight 7-foot-tall giants athletically leap and run past them at breakneck speed.

“The Denver Nuggets, Mr. Kroenke’s cornerstone franchise, have been a pillar of the World Basketball League since the National Basketball Association expanded worldwide in 2022. Denver was a leading proponent of the global expansion of the game, and it’s once-legal marijuana made the city a premiere destination for international fans. The Nuggets were perhaps the best in world to adapt to the four-man game and 12-foot rims, winning the first four WBL titles before the UN dictated recruiting changes to restore competitive balance. Still, the Nuggets have remained one of the great WBL franchises, having won an additional five titles since that time.”

“I could really go for a Pepsi,” Danny whispers to Cello.

“We’re sorry, but sugared, caffeinated beverages are no longer available at WalBev Center,” says their tour guide. “Please enjoy a WalBev Water – Reclaimed Seven Times, For You™”

“I think I’ll pass,” says Danny.

“Speaking of reclaimed water,” the guide says without missing a beat. “Did you know that the Colorado Avalanche were the first NHL team to use artificial ice? The artificial surface was originally intended for the exterior of a Mars transport vehicle and developed by scientists at the University of Colorado. When the manned mission to Mars was officially cancelled in 2037, Mr. Kroenke partnered with the university to create the league’s first non-liquid playing surface. It has been used in every NHL stadium since 2040 and the Avalanche won their fifth and sixth Stanley Cup titles playing on the new surface.

“For his contributions to all varieties of sport, Mr. Kroenke was recognized by the Smithsonian Sports Museum and his dedicated wing will be unveiled to the public next year. Physical or tactilegraphic ticket packages are available through your travel agent.”

“Strange that those survived,” Cello observes.

“It’s a strange future, indeed” notes Danny. “Let’s get back to 2015. I want a Pepsi.”

As they speed back from the future along the space-time continuum, they wave and smile at Benny Bash, who’s headed in the other direction to his own very different vision of the Denver sports future.